I don’t understand people who are like, “Oh my God, you had sex with THEM?” It’s like, “Yes, we happen to turn each other on and there was nothing else pressing to do at the time.”

Sex, to me, is not a big emotional deal at all. It’s like giving someone an extended hug. It’s not like I feel like I’m crossing universal emotional piracy laws when I have sex with someone simply because of convenience: I am there and they are there too–why not?

Maybe I feel altogether far too casual about intimacy but I mean, if someone wanted the luxury of a kind word even when they didn’t exactly qualify for the kind word charity food line out behind the homeless shelter, for God’s sake let’s exchange some kind words and make everyone feel better all around. I have a tongue, there’s no shame in rolling out the red carpet.

But it has to be comfortable too. If they’re not comfortable with me for whatever personal reason then forget about it, let’s just sit apart and avoid eye contact rather than my every blink being misinterpreted and parried. I don’t like it when there’s this whole mystique and mirrors of, “But they’ve already had sex with my friend and this other person I know. How can I just let them have me like that so easy.” Honestly, who but the most small-minded people are counting? Sex is supposed to happen. Get out of the whole “just another notch on her bedpost” mindset and let her have it. Maybe she’ll put up two notches for you.

But really, the whole trepidation about presentation and what if they ask me and how will I deal with it and what if someone calls me a slut and what will they think if we lock eyes or hold hands in a crowded room, and what about the politically incorrect global climate as pertaining to casual heterosexual relations these days? It’s just so confusing. Beating around the bush is for beaten men. As I’m writing this, I received an offline that said, “Too bad you’re not gonna be at the camp, I wanted to f*** you so bad.”

Is there something wrong with that? Is it not honest? Is it unjust? Is it impure, if you conjecture that God creating fucking? It sure is lovely. Is it not of a good report (it was music to MY ears)? If there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things. I’m going to be thinking on that thing.

SexyLittleIdeas.