my love/hate relationship with sex keywords
or How to Become the Popular Kid at Sex High School
Keywords are words and phrases related to your website, product, or topic that can help people find you on Google. If your blog gives tips and counsel on sex and sensuality but more people search for ‘sex advice’ than ‘sex tips’ or ‘advice on sensuality,’ you want to make sure to say ‘sex advice‘ as much as possible so that more people can find you. In my case, I want people looking for keywords like ‘sex advice,’ ‘sex blog,’ ‘sex games,’ and ‘sex positions‘ to come straight to my sex blog instead of having to wade through all the other sex blogs first before coming to this sex blog.
There are also other, sillier-sounding keywords that have less specifically to do with my site, but that so many people search for that it makes it worth it to include them occasionally. These include ‘free sex stories,’ ‘adult sex,’ ‘best sex,’ ‘friends with benefits,’ ‘how to flirt,’ etc. The problem is that no matter how sincere I might be about wanting you to have the best sex of your life – as long as that sex is adult sex and especially best adult sex – saying that in so many words sounds silly.
So this presents us sex blog writers and sex advice columnists who are so concerned about your adult sex lives and about teaching friends with benefits how to flirt… it presents us with a dilemma. We are constantly torn between the rock and the hard place of, 1: using keywords -sounding silly but having thousands and millions of people hear us sounding silly or, 2: not using keywords -sounding brilliant and fun and clever and being read by just our relatives and two best friends.
And so is born not only my own but thousands of great sex bloggers’ love/hate relationship with our sex keywords.
If we delve off the beaten path and create our own clever and personal terms for things, for instance saying ‘sex catchphrases’ instead of ‘talking dirty,’ Google, like the cool kid in high school, sneers at us with a look of contempt on her face, mumbles a string of ‘like, totally, whatever’-s, snaps her fingers back and forth in front of her face, and relegates us to talking to her hand. This then begs the question that if a sex blog columnist (who gives sex advice about sex games and sex positions) types something beautiful and remarkable but nobody reads it, did he really actually …type …that …thing?
Me, I couldn’t care less what Google thinks.
Like the under-appreciated high school newcomer / good guy / protagonist, I will keep on typing my free sex stories and sex advice about best sex, hot sex, and sex kamasutra on my sex blog that includes free literotica, sex games, sex positions, and tips on how to flirt for adult sex enthusiasts and friends with benefits without a backward glance as to what Google and its overrated sex-keyword-saturated search engine is looking for (whether or not that includes talking dirty, hands-free orgasms, and Paris Hilton).
(Sticks hot, wet, dripping, Jessica Simpson tongue out. :P)