or Coming out of the Sex Blogging Closet

Seventy-five percent of women don’t orgasm from penis-in-vagina sex without the added bonus of hands, mouths, or sex toys. When we view penis-in-vagina as the peak of the sexual mountain, we are elevating a sex act that, for many women, is not the one that will bring them the most pleasure. As a straight woman who often derives more pleasure from other sex acts, it seems self-defeating to view those sex acts as less important because they don’t happen to conform to the culturally understood definition of “sex.”

Phone on vibrate. Lover on redial. (There’s a photo to go with this that must be seen – click the link!)

The beauty of kink is there are many degrees and no qualifying guidelines. If a person considers themselves kinky because they like their hair pulled during sex, then by God, they’re kinky. Nowhere does it state a person must wield a flogger for X number of hours before the title of kinkster is granted.

There’s a difference between living as someone I’m proud of and creating a character who I have to present the image of (but come on- you know you want to hang out with cocktails-cowboy-boots-random-non-committal-sex me!).

Without further ado, here are the Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2013. …#58. Sexylittleideas.com (My personal favorite quote of this batch, for selfish reasons.)

Every light casts a shadow, and we’re biologically wired to perceive shadows as dark. But it’s easy to forget about the beautiful, unique and wondrous light that cast the shadow – that’s You. The Light is your public persona: the showcase of your personality, everything you want to be, and want to project. Your Shadow is the opposite, it’s composed of things we keep hidden, the secrets and thoughts we decide to keep to ourselves.

You know how to tell if your female partner is having an orgasm? ASK.

What I find most odd is that most sex blogs are written by women, yet very few women admit to being sexual beings.

The world needs more people that are willing to talk about sex in an open and transparent way, who are fearless when it comes to changing the game, who have a passion for what they do, take pride in it, aren’t ashamed, embarrassed, or scared of having their faces seen. Not that I have a problem with those that do, I understand more than many the importance of anonymity, but the more visible those within the sex positive community become, the better for everyone.

In love, we trust.

PS: I may have posted slight variations of the same comment (about coming out of the sex blogging closet) on more than one of these posts – it had to be said and there are only a certain number of great ways to say it.