sexual martyrs sexylittleideas
or Abstinence Invites Sex


I’ve been trying to say this, but I don’t think I’ll ever say it better.

According to John H. Richardson at Esquire:

“I want to suggest that sex, be it adulterous or premarital or deviant or polyamorous, is a good thing, not a bad thing, and that sex itself is the moment of grace. And that our sterile idea of perfection is the actual sin. To start with the subject on the table, adultery is a brave rebellion against the invisible prison we build for ourselves. When the sad little man Larry Craig widened his stance in that airport bathroom, it was probably the most honest and courageous act of his life. When Clinton got that blowjob in the White House, he wasn’t indulging a weakness (and an eager intern) but enacting the hero’s journey of reconciling inner and outer, risking all to break through the wall of hypocritical purity he had spent years building and projecting to the world in the effort to get elected. By risking martyrdom, in fact, he lifted himself up into an exaltation we still refuse to understand. He was the Martyred Jesus of Oral Sex with Interns and all we see is a mean little sin, as all the sexual deviates pretending to be puritans gathered around in an orgy of denunciation and scandal.”

“What we’re afraid of is the truth. We live in a world in which men and women are buried up to their necks and stoned to death for these same impulses. We recoil at such barbarism with smug assertions of our superior level of civilization while cheerfully meting out our own version of punishment for the same supposed crime — anything to avoid looking at the deeper questions of why adultery exists and what exactly all our endless sexual prohibitions and inhibitions are supposed to do for us. Because if they are there to stabilize the family or inhibit sexually compulsive perversions or avoid the conflicts attendant in jealousy, they’re failing spectacularly and they always have.”

“We have indentured our wives in the role of prison guard, in which she is expected to condemn the person she supposedly loves for the vitality that he is slowly killing inside himself. In doing so, she has summoned her own betrayal, putting out a screaming four-alarm APB to all the available women of the world: My spouse is not happy. My spouse is not fulfilled within the sacred bonds of marriage. The slaves’ deal of self-denial in exchange for a few crumbs has turned out crappy as always, there aren’t enough crumbs, he’s dying of starvation. And so he finally cries “Spartacus!” and goes to fuck some stranger, some biographer or groupie or fan who gives him the adoration we all hunger for in our deepest core, who worships his body as we are supposed to worship only God, who says to him, You are beautiful and deserving of the intimate lavishment of my tongue, who receives him like the beautifully submissive O, the sexual Christ, ‘as a god is received.'”

“Do you think it’s an accident that so many great men are relentless horndogs, or that so many prominent women seem to be completely asexual — asexuality being, of course, as every priest knows, an especially ferocious form of sexuality so intense that it has masked itself in the chador of its opposite in order to sublimate itself into pure will to power? The sexual vitality of the great is essential to their greatness, not an accident to be suppressed or excused.”

“No adult has the luxury of innocence. No married person has the right to la-dee-da along completely ignorant of the frustrations and unfulfilled passions seething in his or her spouse. How many times have those cuckolds and betrayed wives looked away, how many little betrayals and evasions and “not tonight dears” have accumulated in their marriages before the Big Dog finally escapes his/her cage?”

“We extend the majesty of our pity to the wives standing beside their man instead of even once asking where is the wife with the courage to step forward and say, ‘Of course I knew what he was doing. I celebrate him! That’s the man I married, that’s why I married him, for the vital fire you pretend to despise. I know better than anyone, because I have done it myself, that you are making him into a martyr only because you couldn’t kill him completely, couldn’t make him a coward like yourselves. Now Divine Adultery has revealed the truth to me: He had the courage to betray me in the name of the thing that keeps him alive and makes him more a man than you will ever be. Now we can finally put our marriage back together in the world of reality instead of under the rules of your damnable pretense at innocence.'”

“It is not our sex but our hypocrisy that is the annihilator of marriage and destroyer of lives and reputations. Marriage invites adultery. The uniform invites war. A rage for order always invites destruction.”

Click here to read the entire article.